Monday, May 24, 2010

Cabbages and kings


Yesterday, Monday 17th May, they came for me for an M.D.T. which, for those who do not understand the acronyms of prison life, is a Mandatory Drug Test. Everyone gets them every so often, although it is a long time since I had one myself. After all, what is the point or value in testing someone who is well known for being anti-drugs? It's a waste of time and money. Having said that they test all of the non-users from time to time just to make their figures look good, and that is verging on fraud in my opinion - but nobody is asking for my opinion so forget I said that.

The point is that as we traversed the corridor, myself and my escort of po-faced jobsworths, we passed a nurse from the healthcare department.

"Oh!" says she. "You are on a Well Man clinic on Wednesday, did you know that?"

"I do now," said I.

So, tomorrow, Wednesday 19th, I am attending the Well Man clinic in the healthcare where I will be prodded, poked, drained of bodily fluids (they take a blood sample) and generally given an M.O.T. (human bean version, circa 2010). The last time I attended such a bloodletting was in Whitemoor about two years ago and everything was found to be in good order, apart from my cholesterol level which stood at a little over five, and, while it's not disastrous, it's not particularly good. The doctor put me on medication of 40mgs per day of Simvastatin and I've been taking them ever since. I expect that the ould cholesterol level will be greatly reduced by now despite the sedentary lifestyle which I have adopted since becoming medically retired.

I have to admit that I spend a fair amount of my time sitting here at my table, staring out of the window and thinking about all manner of things.

"The time has come," the Walrus said,
"To speak of many things.
Of balls of string and sealing wax,
Of cabbages and kings."
I sit here and, as I say, I stare out of the window. It was a good bit more interesting in Whitemoor, the view that is. I had grass, flower beds, a road and an awful lot of birds to watch. It's not the same here, all there is is a barbed-wire-topped fence that surrounds the excersise yard. Having said that, there are a few birds to watch from time to time so I shouldn't be carping - although a carp is a fish.

I had a letter from Lesley yesterday, as I do most days, and she is her usual self. I thought I was grumpy but next to Lesley I am a positive ray of sunshine, a proper little Pollyanna. Lesley would fit right into that programme we see from time to time on BBC1, "Grumpy Old Women" with Sheila Hancock and Jenny Eclair and that mob. I quite like it, the programme, it makes me laff. Well, let's face it, there are times when I need a bit of a laff in this place. Lesley told me a joke:

A blonde takes her car to a garage to be checked because it is not working correctly.
The mechanic checks it, sorts it out and says to the blonde, "Just shit in the carburettor love."
She says, "Have I got to shit in it every day?"
Lesley is blonde! Ha! It's not the Well Man clinic I need, it's counselling! :)

Response to Anonymous

A couple of weeks ago, around about the time when we heard that we no longer had a government and the Body Politic were at their endearing best as they scrambled for a better seat at the trough, I wrote a fairly tongue-in-cheek bit which ended up on the blog. I didn't intend to upset anyone, although I seem to have managed to do so. I just thought I had made one or two general observations in a fairly light manner!

We had an almost instant response from a Mr Anonymous (from Purley for all I know) and he (or she) seems to have taken what I said to heart. Touched a nerve there, did I?

According to the Purley Vigilante, Labour are nothing short of being CRIMINALS (which was how he - or she - wrote it).

Basically what the Purley Purveyor of Piffle says is that Labour flogged off the family jewels to foreigners, liberated the working classes from their serfdom and generally acted in a way that brought the country to penury. No, sorry, the True Blues did the liberating, Labour just did the rest.

Should I correct the glaring errors for the Purley Pontificator? Well, nobody likes a smart arse but I'll say a couple of things. Those wonderful men and women under the guidance of Mad Maggie started the selling and destruction of the industrial base of this country. Shall I make a little list of what was either sold or destroyed both by and under the Mad Ould Cow?

Steel, Coal, Shipbuilding, Gas, Electricity, Water, Telecommunications, Banks, Railways, Public Transport, Prisons 
- and so the list goes on, all flogged off under Thatcher.  (Incidentally, there is a large organisation in Yorkshire who intend to attend her funeral. They want to see her planted in her grave and then have a party over it.)

Millions of jobs went, the industrial power of this country. The navy has been reduced to next to nothing, the army can barely protect and arm its soldiers and as for the pretty boys of the air force, they are training to fly gliders because there is bugger all else for them to fly. (I'm a navy man myself - maybe I gave it away eh?)

I quote the Person From Purley: "The Conservatives let the working class loose".

Loose from what? A job? The chance to earn a living? The chance to rot on the dole? A waiter's job? This country was once a heavyweight. Our industrial muscle came from the blood, sweat and tears of the working man in the yards, the mines and the foundries. People were proud of themselves. Now? Well, let's try this one for a finale:

I'm an ordinary man, nothing special, nothing grand,
I've had to work for everything I own.
I never asked for a lot, I was happy with what I got,
Enough to keep my family and my home.
Now they say that times are hard so they're handing me my cards,
Because there's not the work to go around.
When the whistle blows, the gates will finally close,
Tonight they're going to close this factory down.

I never missed a day, or went on strike for better pay,
For twenty years I served the best I could.
With a handshake and a cheque it's so easy to forget
That I've served them through the bad times, and the good.
The boss says that he's sad to see that things have got so bad,
But the captains of industry will never lose.
He still drives a car and smokes a big cigar
And likes to take his family on a cruise.

And so condemned I stand, just an ordinary man
Like thousands beside me in the queue.
I watch my darling wife trying to make the best of life,
God knows what the kids are going to do.
Every day I've tried to salvage something of my pride,
To find some work so that I might pay my way;
But everywhere I go, the answer's always "NO"
"No work for anyone here today!"

And as long as I live, I never will forgive
How they stripped me of my dignity and pride.
The things is, Mr Anonymous, it's about people and national pride, not scoring political points at the expense of others.

The Voice In The Wilderness

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Excellent blog.