Gremlins and suicidal mackerel

Anyone who would normally expect to read drivel from me at least once a week may well be wondering where I have been - or there again, probably not. I mean to say, I would have to think an awful lot of myself to think anyone gave a fiddler's fart whether I wrote or not...or, as the Irish would say, "I'd have to be up myself." Well, I hope I am not.

Having said that, there is a good reason why I have been incommunicado for several weeks - it's computer problems again. There are, I am sure, some folk who will remember how self-satisfied I was when I finally managed to get somewhere with one of these things without Andrew breathing advice into my shell-like. My brother had all the equipment needed to ensure my success with the infernal thing and I was quite complacent. Three desktops, three laptops, printers, scanners - the works. Everything should have gone swimmingly, but once again that fickle ould whore Lady Luck decided to take a hand. My brother also has a teenage son who is about as responsible as a snowflake for an avalanche. The lad, bless him, had been on every computer downloading all manner of rubbish until the computers weren't just running slowly, they were barely functioning. So, everything had to be completely cleaned off and all rebooted. (Incidentally, I have no real idea what I just wrote, I merely repeat what I am told.) Anyhoo, that all took a week or so and when they all came back it was only to discover that there was a massive problem with internet connections because of my brother's Wi-Fi connection, incompatible with that of whoever had rebooted our computers. So, it all had to be done again, so I asked him to reboot mine with Windows Seven, which he has - Windows XP has been consigned to perdition now.

What does it all mean?

It means that I am back online again at last, hooray for technology - give me a fountain pen anytime. While all that was going on I have not been idle, I have been slowly rejoining the world of family.

Last week we went fishing a couple of miles outside of the piers here on the Mackem Riviera and I caught five mackerel, not bad for a learner. The fact that mackerel practically commit suicide by catching themselves is neither here nor there. We only came back in because my brother-in-law got sick!

On Friday, after I had seen the probation, we went horse riding - brilliant!

I shall be doing both at regular intervals.

Hopefully the gremlins have now gone from our system.

The Voice In The Wilderness