Thursday, June 09, 2011

Limbo at the Lazy L

Once more unto the breach, my friends, once more. Or... in the motto of the Lazy L, hurry up and wait. At this point there are people saying to themselves, "The idiot is going to tell us that he's got nothing to tell us," and in a way you are absolutely correct - but stone cold wrong too!

Since May 26th, the day that will go down in the annals of history, along with that of Pearl Harbour, the first man to walk on the moon and the day that Boudica discovered what boys are for (free drinks, and you don't need to buy batteries for them), I've been waiting patiently for the Parole Board to hand down their decision - and I'm not the only one.

Well... yesterday, (Saturday the 4th June) I had a letter from my solicitor (solicitor to the motley collection of problem children he calls his clients, me being one of them) and I will quote from that missive:

The panel deferred their deciaion for 14 days and I will forward a copy of the same upon receipt.
As I said earlier - hurry up and wait.

So once again I am sitting bere in my kennel, waiting. The new date is June 9th, and perhaps it will be a week or more AFTER that by the time anything is known. I look on the bright side, of course, I have no option in the matter - and the bright side must be that the panel is considering things carefully. Let's have it right - if they were going to say "bugger off" then they would simply have said it. However, they may still tell me to bugger off, but at least they should hand down a proper reasoned argument for that bugger off. It would fly in the face of everything said at the board, of course, but that would be another matter entirely. I hope for the best but expect the worst. The world's greatest optimistic pessimist, that's me.

Here's a rather odd thing on the same general subject: I have not heard a single word from anyone (other than Boudica) about the hearing, and I find that quite curious and concerning. To begin with, there is my family - not a word; Andrew - he can be expected to send an email every week even when there is nothing to write about! Yet here we are, a hearing at which he was present on his first excursion into the environs of a jail, and not a word! Very curious indeed. Could someone, somewhere be sitting on all mail for some rather odd reason? But if they are, how come I'm getting Boudica's letters and the 47 pictures she has sent me over the last eight or nine days? Andrew emailed her right after the hearing!

Boudica is big on conspiracy theories and no doubt she will see the situation as another one to go with the computer chips the size of a grain of rice that the government plan to implant into everyone's brain for reasons known only to Boudica and her gang of fellow theorists. You know that she will yell at me now for writing that - bad tempered, that's her trouble. Does it come with natural blondes? I mean, is it part of the genetics - blonde hair equals bad tempered? Or is she an exception?

Hee hee, she is reading this, gritting her teeth, stamping her size tens and on the verge of putting her coffee mug through her computer screen. Slow down! Nobody is impressed by your bad temper - and don't write to me with any more unrealistic threats. I used to be an Ovaltini - you don't scare me, pal.

So... where does that leave us?

Nowhere, that's the simple answer. It leaves us absolutely nowhere at all - in limbo, a place banished by the Catholic church apparently, or is that purgatory? Somebody better tell the Vatican that the Lazy L hasn't heard about the banishment of purgatory - it's alive and well here at the Lazy L.

Oh well, I shall simply continue to hurry up and wait, I suppose. Maybe Godot will come along and say, "Waiting for something?"

The Voice In The Wilderness

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